Feeding Therapy Eval prt 2

[Minnie]

Well we went and did our thing, and loooong story short....
We aren't going to do feeding therapy. She let us know that it's an open invitation, and if ever we change our minds, or if he's still struggling after feeling well for a few months (LOL she doesn't know Eric very well does she) that she'll be there for us.
I really feel it's a matter of keeping Eric well that I'm truly struggling with and not oral aversions when it comes to keeping him growing. I could be totally wrong here, but...
No feeding therapy for us, unless his GI completely disagrees.

She's going to write up her report and send it off to the GI. She says it's more about the quality and more importantly the quantity of food he's willing to eat, that he seems open to trying new things, and experimenting and there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with his swallow or speech development to hinder him from eating enough.
I agree. When he's feeling well, it's a whole new more "normal" ball game.

She got him to eat cheese!!!! It was amazing! She totally tricked him, and didn't tell him what it was. It was mickey mouse shaped, and he thought it might be a cookie. "This cookie feels funny." LOL He popped a bite in his mouth and tried it!!!!
He wasn't too happy with her after that, but you know what?!
BY the end of the session he was eating flippin cheese for the first time ever!!! That little bugger actually took her make shift sandwich apart and picked out the cheese to eat! He liked it!!!

He had a harder time with the pasta, but she got him to take a bite. Kinda urks me though. I've been trying to get him to just touch it for 4 years, and it only took her a few steps (well several) to get him to eat the darn stuff.
First she had him touch it. This took a while, and some fancy talking, but he did it and was completely grossed out. Then he actually started having fun touching it. Then she had him stab it with a fork, but he wouldn't do it "No! You're gonna make me eat it! Let's just play cars!!!"
The words she used to get him to trust are words I will continue to use. Not that I hadn't tried to tell him that he didn't have to eat it, but I think my wording was off.
she had him touch it to his lip and keep it there as long as he could, and then the tongue OMG! (jaw to the floor!) and then just bite it with his teeth, but he didn't have to eat it, unless he wanted to. "You never have to eat any food unless you want to."
and HE WANTED TO! he ate it!!!

She's cool, and even though we aren't going to be going on a regular basis I learned a lot just by watching and listening both our visits. I also asked her what I was supposed to do if and when he gets sick again, so everything we've accomplished doesn't fall apart, and we are to give food as always even if he doesn't eat, push fluids, and go no more than 4 days before catering to his every wim as far as food goes, and supplementing.
I told her that I was never able to just let it ride, because he always loses weight. "Let me ask you, doesn't he lose weight even when you let him have popsicles and cookies and crackers, and you don't push real food and let him eat whatever and when ever he wants?"
YES
"Run it by his GI, but I say offer food as you always do, even when he's not well. Just don't let him starve himself for more than 4 days, and push those fluids."

So, if the GI agrees, next time when he can't/won't eat I'll be O.K. to make him tough it out, and maybe he'll eventually do it, or at the very least when he starts to feel better I didn't ruin any progress we made.

Maybe now it won't be 2 steps forward 2 steps back. More like 2 steps forward and only one temporary step back.

Eric is so very proud of himself today, and he should be! He was so very brave!

and I must admit it was REALLY nice having some one else in charge cheering him on with me.

[Christine]

It sounds like a great session and at least not a waste of time.

I can't tell by your post - are you OK with this?

Do you think you will try the cheese and pasta tricks at home?

[Minnie]

Oh yeah,
I'm fine. I'm the one that didn't want to continue with it.

I don't think I'll push the cheese too hard, but yeah, I'm going to try it her way with different foods.
Last night he tried pumpkin pie!
I always ask if he wants to try things, he always says no, and we move on. BUt I think yesterday he had the bug or something. He tried pumpkin pie and didn't even flinch.
"I'm trying all kinds of things to eat today, huh Mom?"

If I can keep him feeling good, this kid is gonna end up being a chef or something! LOL

[Sams Mum]

YAY for him trying new food!

[BethL]

Minnie,

I'm so glad for you that things are going better. Yeah for Eric! It sounds like your Feeding Therapist was really great. I'm glad that she was able to help him and teach you some new tricks. I hope the good news keeps coming for you guys!

-Beth

[Mary]

Nothing irked me like watching B eagerly dip pretzel sticks in jelly and eat them at her feeding eval many moons ago. In our case, though, the feeding therapist was, er, less than kind to me and kept telling me I needed to "just make food fun" for B and that she would eat "if I'd just let her dip things!". She wasn't around when B barfed up all the pretzel sticks in the car, though....

I'm glad you learned some things from her and that Eric did try new foods. I've heard from other moms (I used to sit in the clinic waiting room and chat with/quiz other moms on their kids' feeding habits out of sheer desperation to help B and her feeding) that their kids did the same thing--tried new things in a feeding eval but that the tricks didn't always work at home. Not to sound negative, but Eric displayed this perfectly in his refusal to stab the pasta with his fork--he was on to her and her tricks already.

I'm glad your therapist was so nice and so accomodating. I have a feeling she might be a nice resource to have in your pocket and that, if she's able/willing, she might be good to go see now and then--just enough to keep an eye on things, but not often enough for Eric to catch on that she's the lady who makes him eat stuff he doesn't like.

[Mary]

By the way, thought I'd throw something out there to see if it *might* help you. Adam is my aversive/sensory/I'm-not-touching-that-with-a-ten-foot-pole kid. I never, ever ask him if he wants to try something. Rather, I fix his plate and put stuff on it. If he eats it, fine. If not, fine. (Of course, there's always something on the plate that he likes so it's not as if he walks away starving). Sometimes he'll actually poke at/try something (or sometimes, completely by accident, he'll put something in his mouth thinking it's something else) and then he'll eventually begin accepting small amounts of it. Anyway, it's just sort of a "getting used to seeing it on his plate" sort of tactic. I do the same for B. No asking, no forcing, no cajoling to "just take a bite"...just "here's your food, try it if you want".

[andrea]

So, this might be an incredibly dumb question... but why did you decide not to pursue the therapy? I am confused (I'm a little slow, we all know that by now lol)

[Minnie]

Andrea,
I don't think his eating issues are the cause of his poor growth. I don't feel it would benefit him or me. Sure right now he feels great and FT would go like a dream, (It's going fantasic at home!) but when he gets sick again (yes, I'm just being realistic) bam! This is where the weight loss will happen.
Feeding therapy is not going to fix that, and to tell you the truth... I just don't want to take it on. DH will be gone soon, and taking a taxi to FT twice a week doesn't sound fun.
and the fact that they don't schedule any appointment times that don't interfere with Eric school. well... Really??? take him out of school 2 days a week, so we can get him to eat flippin pasta and soup. It just seems wrong.

And then to top it off.... I'm ashamed to admit.... My Mom pride is also at play. Can't help it. "Like YOU can teach ME how to feed MY child better!? HA!!!"
Yep.... fraid so, your friend has Mom issues.


Now if the GI completely disagrees once she gets the report and has time to look it over, I will follow her lead. For one I respect her and think she's really smart. For another I'll be damned if I am in any way blamed for his continued poor growth, or weight loss. So I will do it to cover my bases, so I can say I did everything I could KWIM?