i just cant go out anymore without waiting for naomi to have a meltdown about God know what! today she was fine and then i had to take hannah to the doctor cause she has a megga ear infection and i went to the chemist after and didnt have the pram (first mistake..) and naomi was a NIGHTMARE. She kept trying to pull me and i didnt know what she wanted cause she cant talk right grrrrr...and then she just lied on the floor....i am over the lying on the floor thing...i really am! i was so embarrassed and she is getting so heavy and i had to pick her up and carry her all the way back to the car while she was limp. I just dont know what more i can take. Cant she just be normal!!! :favorites21: :favorites21: i feel so mean saying that but there are days that i just feel like that. i really do. :sad5:

HUGS nik, no advice here just wanted to send you a big HUG

:hug:

:hug:, Nik. I have those same kinda days.

Welcome to my world.

Try figuring out what triggers the meltdowns. Often, it is just normal behaviour as kids try to push us to the limits to see what they can get away with.

Get yourself a notebook and keep track. Write down what she was doing BEFORE the meltdown, during and afterwards. Write down what made the behaviour stop. It can really help to figure things out.

It does not make it easier, but know that for the vast majority of children, this is just a stage and you will one day look back at this, likely shudder and say 'thank goodness that is OVER!". ;)

It does not make it easier, but know that for the vast majority of children, this is just a stage and you will one day look back at this, likely shudder and say 'thank goodness that is OVER!". :wink:
We still have an occasional meltdown like that..but now it's like whatever:smt036 and if people don't like it ...go ahead say something to me I dare you:violent1: ...LOL....it does become less and less over time, we try to figure out what we can do to end it as quickly as possible...yesterday Steph and I took Jayden to a new park...he went to the top of the slide and saw that on the other side of the park was a lake and a dam....well he hit the ground running...it's amazing how fast a 2 year old can run...LOL...Steph was chasing behind and when he got there he wanted to climb the stairs to the dam...well that wasn't happening and he went into a screaming frenzy....all the people fishing were just staring....Jayden was rolling on the ground in a cloud of dust.....and then up again fighting to get to the stairs ....I grabbed him and threw him up on Stephs shoulders..and wha la! Instant silence...he was on top of the world ..so to speak....he could see everything and was grinning ear to ear.....one quick trip around the park like that and back to the car for a drink and we were good to go...home that is.....:sad5:
As time goes you will find she has less meltdowns too and you will know what triggers them and how to avoid them.....big hugs Nikki:hug:

Funny how you can become used to the meltdowns. And the full blown launches. We are very good at anticipating them now and knowing the triggers help us to ease most of them, but we still get stuck.

There is a HUGE difference between a 'normal' meltdown and an ASD meltdown. Not to belittle any meltdown as they are just awful, but I can truly say you have not witnessed anything until you have lived through autistic meltdowns. I remember being completely taken aback by my beautiful Walker when he began his meltdown stage and wondering how I was going to stay sane through that period. Then along came Curran and I wondered the same as the meltdowns were tremendous in comparison. Then Iain. OMGosh. I had absolutely NO idea how bad they could be. Not a schmeck. On a scale from 1-10 he was blowing 25s. And oddly, when we went to the Autism picnic last year I witnessed some horrifying meltdowns by kids who were full blown on the spectrum and the parents were dealing with it like water off a duck's back. I would have had to be committed. I was trembling after seeing one particular big kid lose his mind and the Mom said it was a good day.

We all are able to deal with what we are used to. Again, I am not in any way belittling what people are dealing with, but just want to point out that kids do have meltdowns. As embarrassing as they can be, every kid has them at one point or another. I have had parents do the look and 'tsk' like they NEVER had their kid lose it. Uh, huh. Anyone who tells you that their kids were always perfect is probably going to try to sell you a beachfront resort in Alaska. :smt036

Last summer when I got Iain his second haircut ever, we had the most incredible meltdown which progressed to a full blown launch of epic proportions. He was hyperventilating and shaking, it was so bad. An old man outside the barber shop said that what Iain needed was a good ole fashioned spanking and that he NEVER tolerated that in any of his 5 kids. I responded that that would be abuse and how lucky he was that none of his kids were Autistic. I said that I was enriched by his words of wisdom and would definitely have to tell all Iain's therapists that beating the child was the way to go. He backed off right away and said he was sorry as he did not realize Iain was 'not quite right'. :censored: Others who witnessed this exchange began to berate the man and he left in a hurry. I was too busy doing an emergency Wilbarger brushing treatment on the bench outside the barber shop to really care what the abusive old coot was experiencing.

Sorry to hijack the thread. :oops: I just have become very sensitive regarding meltdowns and how people react to them.

It is so easy to say that this will pass. I just wanted to let you know I sympathize and empathize and am telling you that it will indeed pass. :hug:

Since we were told that Jason was on the autism spectrum, when he has a meltdown in public...people do stare at us. I just comment to them "he's on the autism spectrum...you can donate to help find a cure for autism" People get dumbfounded, turn red and walk away...

Hugs to you though, I've been on tranquilizers since he has 2-3 meltdowns a day lately!

I have to say that Stephanie will not go very many places with Jayden because of his meltdowns...for the most part she only goes to the park with him..she is embarrassed not so much by Jayden but by the ignorant people staring like she's a bad mom....it is getting a little easier for her...as for me I am pretty tough and if someone wants to stare freaking go ahead....I know why he is acting the way he is and thats all that matters to me...i have never had anyone say anything negative to me yet...(knock on wood) but I know I will not be to nice when it happens ...and I know it's going to happen....

thanks for your replies everyone. I in no way was trying to make her "meltdowns" any worse than one on the Autism spectrum..something that we are still wondering about with naomi due to her symptoms and her severe language disorder. Lets say i hope i never have to deal with a meltown on the Autism spectrum, but at this point in time i am not so sure....

Don't be sorry Nikki...we are just trying to let you know that there are many kiddos who melt down and we all understand the feelings that go with them....reguardless of the reason......and as you cansee some of us are really willing to tell all about them:oops:

thanks Deb.

and yes, i know its hard..its hard to see your child struggle with communicating with you every day, its hard to see them being "different" to others. Its just plain hard.

:hug:

and yes, i know its hard..its hard to see your child struggle with communicating with you every day, its hard to see them being "different" to others. Its just plain hard.

Absolutely. It tears your heart out as a parent.

I am so sorry, Nik. I did not mean to in any way make this into an autism vs. neurotypical (hey, you learn all sorts of neato phrases when researching autism! ) meltdowns. Really, I do mean that meltdowns are just plain awful regardless of the circumstances and was genuinely trying to convey that we understand completely without in any way belittling anyone. Guess I did not do such a good job with that and should avoid posting when tired. :oops:

As Debbie was saying, just wanted to let you know you are far from alone. Not much solace when essentially we are indeed all alone when the meltdown occurs. :sad5:

Have they talked to you about screening?

I hope this will end up being a short lived phase for her. Sebastian used to have some major meltdowns, but he has been a lot better now. I think a lot of it has to do with me learing how to work around him.

I know Sebastian is no were near the level or Ian or even Jayden, but he just has a way of making the simplest tasks soooooo difficult. There have been many times when I wished he could just be 'normal' whatever that is.

I hope you are able to get things sorted out with Naomi. I think things would be a lot easier on you if you knew what you were deaing with and did not have to worry about all of the 'what ifs'.

:hug: nic, josh has not been through that stage yet, he only ever screams when he is in pain (which is alot lately) but i can sympathise with how difficult it must be :hug:

thanks for all the replies. We are seeing the health service this month for her speech and i am going to try and get her into a developmental pead for an assessment as soon as i find one! I am really overwhealmed at the moment but she seems to be getting worse every day and her "strange" behaviour seems to be getting stranger now she is getting older. Her speech or lack of is the main thing that is really really concerning dh and i atm. Hugs. thanks everyone for all your support. Without it i would go stircrazy...and WHEN i finally get a diagnosis for Naomi, if that EVER happens, i know that it wont change her but it will make it just easier to move forward with getting her the help that she needs. thanks guys..x

Just remember that a lot of meltdowns are due to the childs inability to communicate.....they are just so overly frustrated and this is their only release.....once she gets some direction in communication I know things will get better for her and you....:hug:

yer..lets hope thats soon.....:sad5: