View Full Version : Should I make an appointment with an OT for Jack? (X-post)


Aim
07-08-2007, 12:34 PM
I posted this on the "Ask the OT" forum, but I thought I'd also see what you think about Jack's behavior since many of you are dealing with SID firsthand (and aren't supposed to post a response on that forum)...

Thanks to the time I spend here LEARNING about GERD and other related and non-related issues and disorders, I'm becoming more and more convinced that my almost-3-year-old (7/31/04), Jack, has a minor-to-moderate case of Sensory Integration Disorder. As he gets older, it is impacting his behavior and his relationships with me and DH enough that I think we should get a professional evaluation for him. ESPECIALLY before we enroll him in Preschool this fall as we were hoping to do.

He's worked with a Developmental Therapist and a Speech Therapist (through Early Intervention) due to a minor speech delay, but Occupational Therapy was never recommended.

However, I'm also confused/concerned because his symptoms seem to be conflicting with any one form of SID. He is both hypo- and hyper-sensitive. Here’s a rundown of my observations:

1) He hates tags and seams on clothing, but is otherwise EXTREMELY physical (and physically affectionate), often to the point of being unintentionally (but seemingly uncontrollably) rough and aggressive. He hits/bangs things (and people) repeatedly to elicit a response…despite the fact that it is usually not a positive response. (Thankfully, he’s never been a biter, though.)
2) Despite usually being physically affectionate with people, he has just finally started to exhibit some “stranger/acquaintance anxiety” in the last month or so.
3) He LOVES to swing and spin and run around and crash into things…then fall down laughing like crazy.
4) He is NOT clumsy at all...in fact he is a daredevil and is seemingly fearless when it comes to playground equipment, jumping on furniture, etc. People are amazed to observe his climbing/balance skills (from a VERY young age…he was walking at 9 months and climbing rock walls at the local park before he was a year old).
5) He often has HUGE (embarrassing) tantrums when it’s time to transition from one activity to another. (Especially stopping something “fun” or leaving somewhere “fun”.) And it’s hard to know when a tantrum will happen and when it won’t, so it’s not a fun guessing game. But I’ve been finding that SOMETIMES, just taking him into a big bear hug (which is not easy with him kicking, flailing and screaming) will “shut him down”.
6) He seems to get overstimulated and hyper very easily, but can also become fixated on one activity (often a repetitious activity) for an inordinate amount of time. (His Speech Therapist has commented positively on his attention span for his age.) For example, he drives his father and me nuts with pretending to mow the lawn and use a weed “whipper” (as he calls it). It’s not the activity so much that annoys us, as it is the incessant, droning “WAHHHHHHHH” sound effect that he INSISTS must take place during that pretend play.
7) He is a thumb-sucker (when tired or overstimulated) and is very attached to his blue blanket that we have named “Blue”.
8) He is NOT a good eater, wanting to eat/drink only dairy products and sweets/carbs (bread, crackers, pasta). It is a fight every day to get him to eat a “balanced” meal.
9) He is always “on the go” and we find ourselves frequently telling him to “slow down” or “calm down”.
10) He will NOT allow water to be poured on his head during a bath. So it is always a fight to wash and rinse his hair. It’s not even that he doesn’t want water in his eyes, but that he doesn’t like the “feel” of water on his head.
11) He is VERY stubborn and rarely takes the path of least resistance. We don’t want a child who is totally “passive’, and we know he has to “test his boundaries”, but we would love it if we could get him to “go with the flow” sometimes and realize that cooperating even when he doesn’t want to do something will make things a lot EASIER and more pleasant for everyone.

Of course, other parents I talk to or who observe him (and have no knowledge of SID), say he’s just a *NORMAL* (albeit hyper, aggressive and unpredictable) MALE toddler. But as DH and I grow more and more frustrated/exasperated by his behavior and our lack of knowledge on how to “rein it in”, we feel like we need to do something to make life happier for all of us.

We’re also worried about what he’ll be like in Preschool if we don’t get some of these “habits” under control before then. But we’ve also observed that this behavior seems worse around us than it is around “outsiders”. So sometimes we think the fact that we are his sole caretakers (and very rarely have had babysitters for him…we have minimal babysitting support so we only use it for “emergencies” or VERY special occasions) is also causing problems. Like on some level, he’s sick of seeing just the 2 of us (and his baby brother) all the time. So he “acts out” out of frustration, etc. because he doesn’t know how else to express his feelings. But we try to get him outside and to do things (and play with other kids) to burn off some of that energy as much as possible. And he’s definitely more pleasant to live with when he gets some time outside. Unfortunately, the temp has been regularly in the 90s here for the last few weeks, so being outside really isn’t an option and we’ve ALL been going stir crazy!

So anyway….all that being said, does it sounds like he might have some degree of SID, or IS he *NORMAL*, or could there be something else going on? He is super smart, so that also aggravates us, when we know HE knows what he *should* and shouldn’t be doing, but does what he shouldn’t be doing anyway. But I DO also recognize that to be a normal part of raising a toddler. He can also be extremely sweet and thoughtful (he seems to be getting a good handle on “empathy” for the most part), so those characteristics also perplex us as they seem to be “contradictory” to this other behavior that he’s exhibiting.

Sorry this was so long, but it’s the first time I’ve gotten all my thoughts about this situation together in one place. Any insight/suggestions you can provide would be greatly appreciated. I know you can’t officially “diagnose” him, but I’d like to hear your interpretation based on the details I gave. I actually found some local Occupational Therapists that are covered by DH’s insurance, so that makes me even more inclined to make an appointment, if for no other reason than to be told that he is a “normal, rambunctious, inquisitive child” and that we should embrace and nurture it.

Thanks for your time...

twinmom
07-08-2007, 01:16 PM
Aimee, it sounds like Jack might have a few little quirks (like the hair washing and such) but from my experiences, it sounds like he's an all around typical boy for his age.

Some of the quirks you work thru...my youngest had issues with hair washing (the neighbors would often comment that it must be hair washing day as they could hear him) but is actually the most "normal" (whatever that is!) out of my 3.

Everyone has some sensory issues....it's a matter of coping. Even Jason is slooowwwly starting to learn coping mechanisms. You could always call early intervention and see if they would consider it. But if your speech therapist wasn't too concerned to recommend a referral, I wouldn't worry.


Our speech therapist said that he can usually pick out children that need referrals for OT due to sensory issues.

I would just enjoy Jack as he is....boys are active, don't know their own strength most of the time and love to make noises. All children seem to go thru only eating 1 or 2 foods for like a month and then wham! out of the blue, change their tastes. .....somehow my 2 managed to make it to adulthood with no major issues. (or at least I'd like to think so!)

Aim
07-08-2007, 02:29 PM
Thanks, Jane.

But if Jack is OK, then DH & I are the ones that need help! :sad5: We just don't know what to do with him sometimes (we had a REALLY bad day with him yesterday...hence this thread) and feel like total failures as parents. So maybe it's more that we need more tips/suggestions on how to deal (ourselves) with his "quirks". AND maybe part of the problem isn't so much that he doesn't get enough time away from us, but that WE don't get enough time away from HIM. (Gosh, that sounds horrible...but DH and I STILL haven't been out alone since Michael was born...10 MONTHS AGO TODAY!) I mean, we both get to go to work, but ONE of us is always there with the boys and it really does get draining...even with work "breaks". :hairpull:

twinmom
07-08-2007, 10:29 PM
I wouldn't look at it as a failure on being a parent. You need to look at it differently. Jack is still trying to understand what the world holds, you need to figure out how to get Jack to understand the world.

All kids have their moments. Some more, some less. It makes us all individuals. And trust me, those kids and their parents who you thought were staring at you were probably thinking that they were glad that it wasn't their child that time.

Jack is trying to see what he can and can't get away with. This is the age where boundaries and consequences start. It's not easy and trust me, I don't look forward to doing it all over again.

Aim
07-09-2007, 09:07 AM
Thanks AGAIN, Jane, for talking me off the ledge.

DH and I are trying soooooo hard to "get Jack to understand the world". Our frustration is that he's so resisitant to learning what we're trying to teach him! :hairpull:

I guess we just want a "magic answer" on how to get THROUGH to him. (Like pretty much ALL parents of toddlers!) And because he IS so smart, we're probably OVERESTIMATING him sometimes, too, and expecting him to grasp concepts that really are still *beyond* him at this point...*SIGH*

twinmom
07-09-2007, 09:12 AM
I guess we just want a "magic answer" on how to get THROUGH to him. (Like pretty much ALL parents of toddlers!) And because he IS so smart, we're probably OVERESTIMATING him sometimes, too, and expecting him to grasp concepts that really are still *beyond* him at this point...*SIGH*

When you find the "magic answer" please let me know!! I've been searching for 28 years and still can't find it. Just remember how old he really is. He may be smart, but he's still a child. Let him take the lead on some things and on others make sure you put your foot down.

All I can say is invest in lots of tylenol and some tranquilizers!! Your fun is just beginning!