In hindsight, things did go a little better than I expected, since Daniel is very refluxy and I couldn't even get him into the booster seat once yesterday. Still, I cried all the way home. You know, I can handle tantrums, vomiting, tube feeding, constantly cleaning up the floor, etc., but when I let my guard down and actually start to hope someone can help him learn to eat, I pretty much end up in tears, angry and exhausted.

So here's what we did:

First, the OT took him into a playroom and tried to get him interested in a swing or bubbles. She really wanted him to try blowing bubbles (as an oral motor exercise, I assume), and he gave it a half-hearted attempt, but didin't blow any. And even I could barely make them work. I think they were just cheap. Anyway, D was more interested in a fire truck he found. Then she suggested he draw on the blackboard, and he said no, but later -- when HE decided it'd be fun -- he drew a little.

I told her that it was time for me to start his pump, but that I'd wait for her go-ahead, figuring maybe she'd want him to start eating first.

Eventually, we moved into the kitchen, where she washed his hands and then got him into a booster without any problem. I got him a glass of water, and he took a little drink. It was an open cup and he did fine with it. He swished it around in his mouth a bit, but I don't think he spit it out. He was definitely interested in the noodle/pea/bacon/carrot combo I'd brought from home, but after one noodle and one bit of bacon, he said he was done. Normally, I'd push him only a little more, but the OT kept telling him to try things, and eventually he dissolved into a fit. Then she wanted him to help pick up, but he was absolutely furious.

By this point, it was 45 minutes past his regular lunchtime, and I fought a flailing, screaming D to get his pump hooked up.

We went back to the playroom and D settled down. I asked if this kind of fit was typical when starting therapy, and she assured me it was. I mean, he doesn't do this at home, but when he says he's done, I believe him and we move on. The last thing I want is him hating his booster seat. The OT said we'd go back in the kitchen and ask him to help clean up again so that he could see she won't just push food at him.

He went back in calmly but refused to help clean up. Again, it just wasn't his idea. She asked him to put the lid back on his noodles. Nope. She asked him to throw some things in the garbage. Nope. (Normally he'd love doing that.) She asked him to take food off my hand and throw it out. Nope. Finally we settled on him tipping my hand so the food fell into the garbage. Yippee. :banghead:

And that was it. He was so exhausted he fell asleep before we were out of the parking lot. We go back Thursday.

:hug: , Becky.

It sounds like a frustrating appt. I hope this OT knows what she's doing. You've gotten so far with Daniel wanting to sit in his booster at home, and seeing mealtime as pleasurable.

I'm the same way. I want results NOW and I get my hopes up very easily.

I hope next Thursday is more productive. Poor Daniel. It broke my heart when I read he was asleep before you left the parking lot.

:smt056

I am sure how he acted was very normal for any kid doing something new. It is such a slow process and when it comes to our kids, we want a quick fix. Sam is no where near ready for a feeding program, but most around us have a waiting list, so I am looking into them now. I hope you get some good help and I will be looking for some advice in the future==so take notes! Good Luck.

Oh, Becky, :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:


Hang in there, it was his first visit, he is a boy, maybe he was testing his bounderies or something? Keep us posted... what day does he go back?

I'm sorry Becky, I am sad for you. I hope the OT can somehow make it better, even though it seemed worse today. Keep us posted and I will pray for a great outcome!!!

:hug: Bethy doesn't have nearly the feeding issues Daniel does, but I can empathize with some of what you experienced. :-(

Our first appointment was good, but subsequent appointments have been difficult for me to handle--having to hold Bethy's hands down to keep her from covering her face while she screams and kicks and fights while the feeding specialist forces a spoon into her mouth isn't what I envisioned. :smt022 She has slowly made progress and I so hope that you have a similar experience (the progress, I mean!) with Daniel.

Poor little guy. I really hope he bonds with this OT and starts to make progress really soon. :smt056

Thanks, everyone. I know I have to expect slow progress -- and not even necessarily progress after every session. Daniel has to learn to trust the OT and get used to the surroundings.

It's just that, although I couldn't wait for the hour to end, I couldn't help thinking: that's IT? That's ALL you're going to do for him today? THIS is going to make him eat someday???

It is so disappointing, isn't it?

I think we all go in with our hopes up thinking that this magical person is going to get our kids to enjoy eating in no time. :-(

I'm so sorry Becky--even though you know in your mind that it's going to take time, your poor heart really hangs on to the hope that it'll be an easy process. :smt056

Thats true Becky, it is going to take some time to build the relationship...

:hug: Becky, I'm sorry it didn't pan out the way you'd hoped. You're right though, maybe Daniel just needs to learn that he can trust her, and build a relationship there before he will willingly cooperate w/her. I DO hope that this does happen ...I hope the next appt. is more productive. :hug:

Becky..((Hugs)) to you. It sounds like it was quite frustrating at the appointment. Maybe it will take a few times for him to adjust. I hope it all works out for him and you both. You have worked so hard to get him to where he is at today for someone or something to give him a nudge backwards....Good luck Becky and let us know how it goes at his next appointment:)

That had to be such a frustrating experience for both of you, Becky! You have to wonder how all this "therapy" really works. When we were foster parents, we had to take children to play therapy, and I'm still not convinced that's not just a crock. However, these are trained professionals ...

I hope your appointment Thursday is more productive. :hug: :hug: :hug:

Sometimes I think all therapy is a crock, too. Sure, D's speech improved after starting his hippotherapy, but in all likelihood it would have progressed well anyway. All they're really doing is trial and error. How I wish this was a hard science....

Ummm, hate to horn in as the pseudo-expert here, but I have to tell you honestly...a lot of therapy is a total crock. Just don't tell my colleagues I said that.

I just realized that my comment is going to offend some people here. Sorry. But I get cynical....

(Thanks for backing me up, Mary! And Lesley, too!)

You're not going to offend me.

I don't trust anyone until I get to know them/see them in action--this includes therapists, doctors, whomever. I know some of the doozies I went to school with! :coffee:

So, anyway, back to the main purpose of this post....

Last night I was complaining to my mom that the session was terribly negative and we didn't actually DO anything. (I mean, what routine? D thrives on routine. I was excited about seeing what she meant. And I didn't see anything.) My mom said, to just give it a few weeks and if it's not working, we can stop. But I told her that I couldn't stop. Ever. Until D was eating. This is basically our last hope here in Albuquerque. (And there are no other cities of any size in the state.) I need help with feeding Daniel, and this is our chance. So I'm not going to give up. (I'm just going to b**** about it! :wink: )

Thank you so much for posting this. While it's frustrating and I really feel for you, you have given me a rational idea of what we are going to be going through once we start therapy in a couple weeks. I really hope Daniel takes to this program and thrives.

Also kept meaning to tell you I absolutely LOVE your avatar picture! He is just too cute.

Sorry, I'm late on this Becky. Daniel seems like such a bright little boy, I bet (and pray) that he'll pick up on all that eating stuff very soon. I don't know anything about feeding therapy, but we start Monday, so we can then b*tch together. :hug:

Becky, it sounds like rough start. With some kids, it just takes time for them to get into doing something new. Hopefully, with time, Daniel will get the idea and you'll start to see some progress. I'm glad you're going to keep at it, but in the meantime, you go on ahead and complain whenever you need to. We're here.

Becky, I'm late on this as well, sorry.
I'm so sorry that it didn't go well, we also had a *weird experience* with out OT, but I wasn't sure what to expect.
I hope that things improve!
{{hugs}} to you!

I'm sorry that the first feeding therapy session went so poorly for you and Daniel, and hope that the next one goes much better! We've had great success through all of Evan's various therapies. I don't think he'd be eating, walking, learning to write his name or starting to speak without all of his therapists.

Today was GREAT! Check my journal (click "See how Daniel's doing" below) if you want details. But here's the short version: He was happy and cooperative and ate about as well as he ever does, and the OT said she could tell he doesn't move food to the back of his mouth, that he has sensory issues we'll work on, and that he's very willful -- so she'll definitely be keeping that in mind as she works with him.

Glad to hear it went so well today. Having Daniel at the gym and then out on the playground may be really helpful in working on some of his oral-motor activities. Gross motor activities often help the body get reved up but also may help the child's mind focus on more fine motor and oral motor tasks afterward. At the early intervention program I work at we often have the children play in the movement room or outside before comming into the playroom for other therapy activities for that very reason. I hope he continues to do well.

Take care, Pam

SOrry I didn't get around to posting eralier.. but I am soooooo pleased that the feeding session went well today Becky. I hope that it it re-installed some confidence in this therapist for you. Looking forward to hearing more updates!

Glad to hear that today was better.

Oh that is good news Becky!!! I am very happy now :)

Yeah! I'm glad to hear it went well! :)

:yahoo: Woohoo!! Glad it went better!

I am really glad that it went better today. hopefully the more he goes the more he will trust her. When I first took Cooper to his speech therapist I was so worried, cause he is very reserved, but now she has him eating out of her hand now and he can't wait to see her.
Whens the next appt.

Whens the next appt.

We'll be going on Tuesdays and Fridays. (But not today -- she was out, which is why we went yesterday.)

For those of you who are interested, I'll continue posting details in my journal. I just dont' want to continue boring everyone here!

I'm so happy that yesterday's session went so much better. As long as the therapist remembers that Daniel is "willful", I'm sure she'll be able to work around it better. In response to Pam's comment, we do a lot of roughhousing, vibrations, rolling in a blanket, rolling on an exercise ball, etc. to get Evan's nervous system up to where it should be. This helps him to settle into his work and to concentrate better.